Two feets they come a creepin' 
Like a black cat do 
And two bodies are lyin' naked 
Creeper think he got nothin' to lose 
So he creeps into this house, yeah 
And unlocks the door 
And while a man reaching for his trousers 
Shoots him full of .38 holes

[Chorus]
Its a Saturday night special 
Got a barrel that's blue and cold 
Ain't no good for nothin' 
But put a man six feet in a hole

Big Jim's been drinkin' whiskey 
And playing poker on a losin' night 
Pretty soon, Big Jim starts a thinkin' 
Somebody been cheatin' and lyin' 
So Big Jim commences to fightin' 
I wouldn't tell you no lie 
And Big Jim done grab his pistol 
Shot his friend right between the eyes

[Chorus]

Hand guns are made for killin' 
Ain't no good for nothin' else 
And if you like your whiskey 
You might even shoot yourself 
So why don't we dump 'em people 
To the bottom of the sea 
Before some fool come around here 
Wanna shoot either you or me